KC Avalon’s Daily Blog

Happy Father’s Day Dads
Things Fathers Say:

1 He turns into a weatherman and can’t resist telling you the temperature when he sees you going out for the night.
2 When you ask for something he tells you to ask your mother. She says to ask your father. You get bounced around like a ping pong ball.
3 He can’t resist putting “When I was your age” into a story. Four score and two hundred years ago.
4 He acts like a big spender when he hands you a $20 bill like it’s a hundred then says, “Don’t spend it all in one place.”
5 He loves when someone stands in front of the TV so he can tell you that you make a better door than a window.
6 He can’t resist using wacky sayings like “He folded like a cheap lawn chair.” Oh boy we better get pops outta here.
7 You ask for an ice cream and he answers with, “What am I a millionaire?” Not even close you big spender.
8 When he says, “Don’t tell mom. This will be our little secret.” You got him now! Let the bribery begin.
9 Dad always knows when you touch his thermostat. He is like the Gollum in Lord of the Rings. My precious!
10 “I need to make a quick stop.” Next time you get no drinks before traveling. It’s pretty bad when you see more rest stops them land marks on your road trip.

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KC Avalon’s Daily Blog

When you need a vacation so bad:
1 You go to your destination only to find out that you can’t leave your room for 14 days. By the time you get out, vacation is over.
2 You have a beach house and are finished serving the required quarantine. Jokes on you. Everything is still closed. It’s like you woke up after the season was over.
3 If you are single, pick a resort and a random stranger and inform them that you decided to quarantine with them for some fun.
4 Camp out on the beach for a change of scenery.
5 The only vacation you can take is a virtual vacation on Google Earth. You have been all around the world. I am a world class traveler.
6 You turned your house into a resort. The club is in the basement, restaurant in the kitchen, spa in the bathroom, gym in the living room and pool in the backyard.
7 Your candlelight dinners have become curbside pickups shared in the car with the headlights on.
8 You took a road trip and never got out of the car.
9 You took a cruise and didn’t realize that you would not be allowed to come out of your shoe box of a room. Your meals are left outside of your door.
10 The only way to visit your neighbors is through the lens of your telescope.

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KC Avalon’s Daily Blog

Happy Mother’s Day!! Today it is your right to drive your kiddos a little crazy with some role reversal.
1 Wait until they sit down and get nice and comfy then ask for something to eat or drink.
2 Take their car out and use all of their gas so they have to fill up their car next time they drive it.
3 Since they never write down when they use the last of something, hide all the batteries so that they are out of luck when their controller turns off. Too bad.
4 Talk non stop when they are watching their favorite show.
5 Leave your stuff all over their play room floor and see how they like it.
6 Tell someone what your kid said about them or rat on them to dad.
7 Jump up and down on their bed when they are sleeping.
8 Bust in on them when they are in the bathroom.
9 Ignore them when they call your name and make them repeat themselves a few times.
10 Put saran wrap over the toilet so that it gets everywhere when they pee. It’s not like they can hit the target anyway.

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