KC Avalon’s Funny Top Ten Blog-

The new guy at work:

1 Shows up early and stays late and doesn’t even look at their phone. (Hey you. Yeah, you. You trying to make the rest of us look bad?)
2 Has tons of new ideas and wants the boss to use all of them. (Learn to shut your mouth kid. We don’t like change around here. Keep it up and I’ll bust your kneecap.)
3 Is full of energy and happy in the morning. (Are you on drugs? Pee in this cup, immediately.)
4 Can’t stop talking about their old job and coworkers. (Don’t care. Maybe you should go back where you came from.)
5 Looks cool but is really a few cards short of a full deck. (Boss! I need a cubicle ASAP.)
6 The boss lets them order a new chair after you have been sitting in a ten-year-old chair that has been threatening to throw you on the floor with all the noise it makes. (Hate to see the new guy’s face when they inherit my piece of crap chair and I get the new one. They haven’t even earned a stapler yet.)
7 They don’t look old enough to drive and think they are smarter than you after a couple of days at work. (You talkin’ to me? I think it’s time for your diaper change junior!)
8 They jam the copy machine, use all the paper in the fax machine, run out of toner in the printer, and use all of the toilet paper and have the nerve to walk away. (Excuse me! We follow a certain code around here. If you refuse to comply, your things will start disappearing.)
9 They complain about their work after the first week. (Hey buddy, unemployment is looking like your best option right about now. You haven’t been here long enough to complain.)
10 They talk constantly and won’t stop. (We don’t have time out at work so I will keep giving you work until you shut your mouth.)

#top10 #funny #newguy #blog

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