1 You bring a picture of what you want your hair to look like. Your stylist has her own vision but it wasn’t anything like your picture. You look like your mother in the sixties. Did my grandmom call you before I showed up?
2 You ask for a trim and get a hack job. Can you please reattach my hair? She must have been jealous of your beautiful hair. She did this on purpose.
3 You want to switch things up by going to someone else. When you go back to your regular stylist she notices and treats you as if you cheated on her personally. Honey, I never said we were exclusive. Don’t go psycho.
4 You ask for highlights but when it is done, you can’t even notice. You need a magnifying glass to see them. A bottle of lemon juice would have done more.
5 After your haircut, you realize one side is longer than the other. I demand to see your hairdresser certificate! I am ripping it up.
6 You ask for your bangs to be trimmed. When she is done you look like Jim Carey in Dumb and Dumber. What the flip were you thinking?
7 Your barber forgets to check the guard on the clippers and takes out a chunk of hair. You heard the weed whacker sound and immediately after she says oops. Oops, your ass! You can’t undo this one.
8 You want your eyebrows shaped and when you look in the handheld mirror, you want to hit her over the head with it. You look like Ronald McDonald. I didn’t ask for arches!
9 You want some blonde in your dark hair but your hair looks frosted when you are done. You look 20 years older. Thanks a lot, lady!
10 Your hairdresser over books and works on too many people at once. You are feeling neglected and went there to be pampered. If you wanted to be ignored, you could have stayed home.